If you haven’t already heard, I’M ENGAGED! My dream guy asked me to marry him and we’re both currently on cloud nine. The guy that I’ve prayed about for years, the one who my mom has prophesied about, the one who will drop anything in a moment for me. The guy who loves me past all the walls I try to put up, the one who can make me laugh in most (not all lol) situations, the one who points me to Jesus at all times, and the one that is able to help keep me calm during tough seasons…that guy asked ME to be his WIFE. WHAAATTT. A lot has changed in the past 48 hours. I’ve added another title- fiancé, and it’s my honor. When people look at our pictures and posts, they see the smiles, the laughs, and the pure joy. This past Sunday was the sweetest day of my life, but the past several months haven’t been that way for us.
We’ve walked through hard conversations with parents, nights filled with tears worried about the future, fighting lie after lie from the enemy, tough talks with friends, financial insecurity, anxiety, depression, spiritual warfare, insecurity about appearances…you name it. But it’s been worth it. If I had to walk through all the crap we did to be able to call Jono my fiancé, I would do it a thousand times over. If I had to walk through the tough seasons to be able to encourage others in their friendships and relationships, I would do it a thousand times over. If I had to walk through the tear filled nights to be able to understand the Lord’s heart and character even more, I would do it a thousand times over.
So if you’re currently in one of those tough, “everything feels like it’s falling apart” seasons, HANG IN THERE. Cling to the cross. God’s got you, even if it doesn’t feel like it, I promise. The mountain top moments feel even sweeter after the tough, valley seasons. God is faithful even when it feels like nothing is happening.
And my fiancé, Jonathan Abraham Jacob (Jono), is a living testament of the Lord’s faithfulness in my life. As an Indian American girl who had never dated anyone for the first 22 years of my life, I was sure that the Lord had destined me to singleness, and I was okay with that. And I think that was more of my actual thoughts than the Lord. I was so sure that no one would love me for who I was- selfish, broken, complicated. But I was proven wrong, and I’m so thankful I was.
If you know the beginning stages of our story, you know that it involves a lot of heartache as a result of obedience to the Lord. I won’t share our whole story right now, but know that I will be the first to tell you that obedience to the Lord does not always feel right, but obedience is not and cannot be based on a feeling. If I hadn’t been obedient in taking a leap of faith and making the first move, we probably wouldn’t be where we are today. In our story, if Jono had not been obedient to the Lord’s voice at the right time, we probably wouldn’t be where we are today. And as a result of obedience, God has been able to reveal more of His faithfulness to us than I would have ever known. “Great is [the Lord’s] faithfulness and his mercies are new every morning.” We’ve been able to experience the faithfulness of God in new depths because of obedience, so trust Him.
We have learned how amazing the fruit of obedience is. We’ve had to step away from the timeline we wanted. We’ve had to give up things that don’t matter when looking at the big picture. We’ve had to learn to trust the Lord and that He is faithful. And we’re called to obey.
Obedience is a form of worship in and of itself. It’s us offering our hearts and lives to Jesus. It’s us offering our lives for His glory. Obedience is not just about what our hands can give, but about the posture of our hearts. It’s not about what we do in response to how we feel. And as we walk in obedience, we’re called to trust the He is faithful.
And God’s faithfulness is not dependent upon a feeling. HEAR THAT LOUD AND CLEAR: God’s faithfulness is not dependent upon a feeling.
Our obedience is not dependent upon a feeling.
God’s faithfulness is not dependent upon our obedience.
Even when it’s hard, trust that He is faithful as you walk in obedience. And if you don’t know how to walk in obedience- spend time in His presence, spend time in God’s word, surround yourself with community that will help point you to Jesus, but also call you out with love as needed, find a mentor to walk through life with you, fast and pray, worship.
And now stepping into 2020- a new year, a new decade, a new season, trust that the Lord is faithful. Especially when it doesn’t “feel” like it. In scripture time and time again, we see stories that reveal the faithfulness of God—
- Noah and the flood
- Moses leading the Israelites out of Egypt
- Joseph being thrown into prison
- when Ruth and Naomi were widowed
- Esther becoming queen
- Mary and Joseph’s journey to Bethlehem
And that’s just a few. We see story after story of ordinary people walking in obedience. We see how God remained faithful to them every time. Things may not have gone the way they planned, but God continued to show up and be faithful. And He continues to do the same for us.
So hold fast to that as you enter 2020, as you enter a new decade—
Walk in obedience. Trust the Lord’s faithfulness.
Photography by Callie Rae Cherry